You can pre-order both games over at the Online Store!
Archive for the ‘Games’ Category
New Parsely Games for Pre-order
Wednesday, September 8th, 2010Lacuna
Tuesday, September 7th, 2010
rocktaNe
Saturday, August 28th, 2010
An inspired take on my most beloved RPG (besides FreeMarket).
Parsely: Microgreens #1
Friday, August 20th, 2010
This one was inspired by a ride in a subway train headed to Times Square with Miss J.
FLAMING GOAT!
Subway
> You are in the subway. There is an escalator here.
There is a vending machine here.
Exits are: Up
Look machine: This once-functioning vending machine appears to dispense soda.
Examine machine: Searching the machine carefully reveals an unopened can of Sprite.
Look Sprite: It is an unopened can of Sprite, with limon. It is dusted with minimal rat feces.
Drink Sprite: Ew, rat feces! You wisely decide not to quench your thirst.
Look escalator: The escalator is broken. Now, it is merely stairs.
The Up command does not work.
> You step onto the bottom step and are surprised to find that you go nowhere.
The player must actually walk up the escalator.
Broken Escalator
> You are standing on an broken escalator. There is a flaming goat here, blocking your path.
Exits are: Up
Up continues not to work.
Look escalator: The escalator remains stairs.
The Up command does not work.
> You are surprised to find that you go nowhere.
The player must actually walk up the escalator. But sadly, a flaming goat blocks his path.
Look goat: The goat is on fire. He looks angry and hungry.
The player must open the can of Sprite and pour it on the goat to douse the flames.
The player can then feed the empty can to the goat, who will then depart. The player may then walk up the escalator.
Top of Broken Escalator
> You are standing at the top of the broken escalator.
You can now resume your daily commute. What was up with that goat, eh?
THANK YOU FOR PLAYING FLAMING GOAT!
YOUR SCORE IS 100/100!
In dev
Monday, August 16th, 2010
We don’t stop for anyone. We’re plastic but we’ll still have fun.
She’s a shadow, sleeping
Saturday, August 14th, 2010She’s naked of course and there’s a pink and gold serpent skin print running down her body, shimmering in the hot, bright stage lights. On every side, thousands of screaming fangirls aping her makeup and hairstyles from the last album, the one they downloaded from the net. In the heat and the tumult of crashing bodies, sweat dripping down their faces, they look a mess. But not like her. She’s perfect. Millions of dollars of perfection. Her Scute™ is synced to the sound and light show going on around her and at a pre-programmed moment, the stage is blasted with white-hot incandescence and her skin, hair and nails turn jet black. She’s a living shadow, dancing in the hot sweet rhythms of the #1 song in the nation and her fans are freaking the fuck out.
After the show, she collapses. Her manager throws her into a tub of ice water and her body temp re-regulates. That’s the problem with this model: heat waste. She’s almost a gynoid at this point. Fake skin, fake nails, fake eyes, fake hair. Fake fake fake but more real than anything else is the money she’s pulling in for these shows. A great investment, thinks the manager. Well worth the expenditure. Well worth the cost. She’ll be asleep for a few hours and then they’ll slap on some stimulant snaps to wake her up so she can do the next show. Everything is prepared for her arrival. Everything is running smooth and on time. Just let her sleep.
Lil’ John RPG
Wednesday, August 11th, 2010Player A says something to Player B. Player B responds with one of these three words:
OKAAAAY!
“I accept your proposition and would like to respond.”
YEEAAAH!
“I agree with what you’re saying. Please continue.”
WWWHAT?
“Please, explain what you mean in more detail.”
…or Player B may disagree with Player A and issue a challenge by asking:
“ARE YOU FUCKIN’ WITH ME?”
Player A responds with either “Yeah!” or “What?” If Player A responds with “What?” then Player B may offer a rebuttal. If Player A responds with “Yeah!” then Player B commands:
“STOP FUCKIN’ WITH ME!”
…in which Player A responds with either “Okay!” or “What?”
And so on.
Rob Justice’s GenCon 2010 swag video
Tuesday, August 10th, 2010Don’t Call.
Monday, August 9th, 2010
